Make the commitment to Better Living

Perhaps it was seeing the discrepancy between how you spend your time in your actual day versus your ideal day.  Or, maybe you have found that you are upholding a lifestyle that isn’t serving you.  Or the concept of “navigating with curiosity” has piqued your interest!  Whatever it may be, something has brought you to this page in which you will make the commitment to better living. Congratulations!

Now what?

Making the commitment to better living begins with a re-commitment to your most important human relationship:  the one you have with yourself. In fulfilling this commitment, I will challenge and support you to examine every facet of your life.  I have to tell you, this will NOT work if you see yourself as deficient!  Recall the post where we examined the “problem with problem solvers…”  The defensiveness that problem solvers encounter from others in the workplace pales in comparison to the barriers and excuses we throw up in defense of ourselves when we feel threatened.  Instead of defensiveness, I request that you employ kind curiosity and appreciative inquiry as you honestly consider essential aspects of your life in your quest for better living.

Truly knowing yourself takes hard work, and honest reflection, and a lot of love.  It is the essence of Character.  To quote Helen Keller:

Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet.  Only through experience of trial…can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired, and success achieved.”

Better living isn’t for sissies.  It’s for people with integrity, people who know who they are without apology or explanation.  They enjoy their own good company. They know what they can and cannot do…and are fine with both.  They not only add value to wherever they put their energy, they have the ease and grace to allow others to do the same.

To commit to better living means to accept that your life is perfect right now…so that it is from a place of strength that you are choosing better living.  (The commitment to better living means to accept paradoxes like “perfect now allows for better in the future!”)   The commitment will mean that you’ll champion yourself, be a self-advocate, and bestow upon yourself greater care and kindness than you’ve ever, ever done.

Please proceed if you can answer yes to the following questions:

  • I am curious about the concept of better living.
  • I agree that getting to know what I need, and learning how to ensure that I get it, will help me be more effective.
  • I will try new activities, stop some activities, and spend time in reflection to accomplish better living
  • I want to stop “carrying around” attitudes and behaviors that keep me from learning and which prevent better living.
  • I’m done with expecting to be annoyed.
  • I want people to know what I stand for.
  • I want to accomplish more than I ever dreamed possible.
  • I’m ready to express what is most valuable to me, every day.
  • I’ll appreciate and share my unique gifts, and respect those gifts in others.
  • I’m ready to enjoy instead of struggle with my life.


© 2011

Mary Ellen Sailer, Ed.D.


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9 Responses to Make the commitment to Better Living

  1. Jeannette says:

    I guess I have to pay more attention to my life…

  2. Dan Jr. says:

    I liked your article is an interesting topic
    thanks to google I found you.

  3. Preston says:

    Cool post. Fantastic writing.

  4. Maria says:

    Keep up the quality posts

  5. Campbell says:

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  6. Bronte says:

    Simply want to say your article is as astonishing. The clarity in your post is just cool. Thanks a million and please keep up the rewarding work.

  7. Mary Ellen Sailer says:

    If you’re wondering what got me to include it in this blog post, I’m happy to to tell you. What appeals to me in her quote is that character development takes
    W O R K. It isn’t something to acquire, but something to develop!

    And, to your contention…yes, I would agree! Thanks for your comment, Paul.

  8. Paul says:

    You’ve got me thinking about Helen Keller’s quote, “Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet.” I’m wrestling with the quote in order to find the truth in it.

    Would you agree with my contention that ‘ease and quiet’ are rare commodities in 21st Century life? Instead of ease and quiet we have an abundance of ‘cacophony and stress’ that is both unnecessary and largely self-inflicted. To the extent that I’ve developed character, I want to use it to quell ‘cacophony and stress’.

    Perhaps Keller was referring to the flawed and damaging strategy for finding ‘ease and quiet’ that leads us to barricade ourselves inside the little world of self and ignore the demands that maintaining proper relationships with others entail.

    I recommend that we cultivate a reservoir of ‘ease and quiet’, ‘peace and acceptance’ and use those resources to insure that our attempts at conflict resolution and reconciliation are effective.

    Just sayin’

  9. Dylan says:

    “Better living isn’t for sissies.” That really made me laugh! But you’re right, it takes courage to let people know what I stand for. I’M IN! It’s too tiring to struggle all the time…

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